Happy 'almost' 13th Birthday Caleb

I can't believe I will officially have a teenager tomorrow. (In 12 hours to be exact) Where does time go? As crazy & hard at times as the last 13 or 14 years were part of me wishes I could go back just a little bit. I want to hold that little blonde curly haired blue eyed boy that completely stole my heart . This one: 

He melts me. He was the reason I got to be called Mama. He might be almost as tall as me but he will always be my little boy. Yes I am crying. 

Dear Caleb, 

During that 9 months you were in my belly I was so young & honestly scared. I new the moment I laid eyes on you though that I could do this, that forever it would be me and my boy. Your deep blue eyes & blonde hair and that gapped tooth smile melted me. You have taught me so much over the last 13 years, you are part of my pride & joy. 

You are Compassionate, Loving, Big hearted and So funny. (too funny at times) Together we have learned that when something is hard as long as we keep working on it anything is possible. I know you don't love school but you have proved to me and yourself what hard work looks like & I love seeing that look of accomplishment in your eyes. You love sports, music & any kind of gun. You are truly a boys boy, dirt is one of your besties. I love that you are a dreamer, you believe that anything is possible and you are so right buddy. Anything you want to do in this world you can with hard work, dedication & passion. Sometimes you just have to dig really deep to find it but always remember it's there. I am honestly a little nervous about the next few years, these are the years that you find yourself while having some independence. This is when peer pressure is real, mistakes are made, lessons are learned and there is plenty of new fun to be had. 

I worry about you so much, I worry about the mistakes you haven't made yet, the friends you will pick, the attitude you have shown at times (not fun). Most importantly I worry about your heart. I want you to more than anything to always remember there is a higher power God created everything about you that made you who you are. He made you exactly who you are supposed to be, I want you to make the best choice even when it's not easy, I want you to learn from your mistakes, I want you to be able to say you are sorry when you are wrong. I want you to stand up for you what you believe in. I want you to show compassion for those who need it, I want all these things and more for you. I pray for you everyday buddy & I want you to know that I couldn't imagine my every day with out you. You have made me into the woman and Mama I am today. I am not perfect, I have bad days & make mistakes too. I can't wait to see what 13 brings us, I am already so proud of the young man you are becoming, I will be here for you every step of the way. I am the biggest fan that you have in this world. I love you with all my heart. And always remember that you can move mountains my sweet boy! 

All my love 

Xo, 

Mama